U.S. GRADUATING STUDENTS LEAD THE WORLD

U.S. GRADUATING STUDENTS LEAD THE WORLD

U.S. GRADUATING STUDENTS LEAD THE WORLD

IN...


after school brawls


athletic team sado-homo teabagging


belly button piercing


cellphone text messaging


class skipping


date rape


detention


dropping out


fire alarm pulling


food fights


locker combination reminders


pencil sharpening


prom night alcohol-related car crash fatalities


promiscuity


science lab vandalism


textbook margin doodling


untied shoelaces

COPYRIGHT 2007-2014 OH BOY! 3LAWNVIEWAGOGO / ALL RIGHTS RESERVED MR.E.

ED SPRINGSTEAD, JR.

YOU'RE BETTER OFF NOT DANCING AT THE PROM

YOU'RE BETTER OFF NOT DANCING AT THE PROM

IF...

people can hear you doing it

the other dancers are slipping in your sweat

you’re the only white guy there

you’re Carrie

your dance-partner thinks you’re fighting diarrhea and points you towards the rest room

paramedics insist on sticking something between your teeth to keep you from swallowing or biting your tongue

you’re wearing tights and a tutu

the song playing is “It’s Raining Men”

it’s a slow dance and you came with your sister

you’ve a conjoined twin

you’re a slasher disguised as a teacher and there’s butcher’s cutlery hidden under your corduroy jacket

it’s during the memorial moment for that kid who had cancer

COPYRIGHT 2007-2016 OH BOY! 3LAWNVIEWAGOGO / ALL RIGHTS RESERVED MR.E.

ED SPRINGSTEAD, JR.