OUCH! by MR.E.: GIRLS GONE WILD

Monday, July 1, 2013

GIRLS GONE WILD

WHERE THE "GIRLS GONE WILD CAN BE FOUND TODAY

Artie Lange personal appearances

Beauty School graduations

Born Again baptisms

Bus Stations

Child Custody hearings

Date Rape Support Group meetings

Halfway houses

Ladies' Nights at Applebees, Bennigans, and Ramada Inn lounges

Ludacris, Snoop Dogg, and Fiddy Cent concerts

Mental hospitals

Morgues

Rehabs

STD clinics

Strip joints and Go-Go bars

WWF audiences

GIRLS YOU'D LOVE TO SEE GO WILD

that cousin you only run into at weddings and funerals

every cheerleader you've ever seen

your fifth grade teacher (back then)

the good looking Olsen twin

LuAnne Platter on King of the Hill

the secretary in the whose "hair smells terrific," the young mother who needs a car "that's both roomy and sporty," the daughter whose mom washes her Catholic school blouse "whiter than white," and that redhead on the Wendy's commercials

GIRLS YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO SEE GO WILD

your sister

my sister

Sister Mary Elephant

that lone female on the road construction crew

Larry Wachowski

the Secaucus Ladies Auxiliary Bowling League Runners-Up 1993

Elle Fanning (yet)

Tootie, Natalie, and Jo

UNSUCCESSFUL GIRLS GONE WILD VIDEO SHOOT LOCATIONS

Abuse Survivors Self-Esteem Rebuilding Workshops

Breast Cancer Support Group Meetings

Brownie and Girl Scout Jamborees

Burn Wards

LPGA Tournaments

Lilith Fair Concerts

the Middle East